Rose Sinclair

Gargoyle Clan
by

Gargoyle Clan

by Rose Sinclair

Not long ago I had the good fortune to gather and celebrate with like-minded people and as we caught up, one said to me, “I am glad to see you well.”

I thanked him and explained what was happening in my waking world to which he replied, “I am also glad that life circumstances are peaceful for you, but that is external, I mean you are well on the Inside.”

I paused and considered the difference. What Sight was necessary for him to perceive them separately without being invasive? The idea for the Gargoyle Clan was born. External circumstance doesn’t imply the Stuff originates with me; how do I sort that out? How could I make informed choices about what I was feeling/perceiving/responding to, and see clearly what the implications of those choices might be?

How often do we find ourselves in situations where we are stuck wondering what to feel, say, think, do, or even perceive? Sometimes we get whelmed by sensory overload, regardless of what sense(s) we mean. Sometimes we are convinced we feel something; it wasn’t a spider crawling on us after all, but our own hair moving gently in a breeze (I laugh even now considering spinning around trying to find what was tickling me only to find it was me!). How can we refine what we perceive, how can we separate psychic (and even physical) “noise” from that which is potent and important for Us to know, to sense, to allow, and perhaps to act upon?

There is more to the idea of grounding/centering/shielding than may seem evident. It isn’t enough to say “ground yourself” — that can sometimes feel like we are a fish being told a climb a tree. These processes involve some nature of flow — whether from the self to the physical earth, or in the mind using visualization to affect reality, or light touching our optic nerve; all requires flow. At Twilight Covening this year the Gargoyle Clan will work deeply with this flow concept. What flows over me, around me, past me, through me? Can I change the flow? Can I turn it off and on? What about your flow and how it affects me? In these days of information/idea whelm, Gargoyle Clan will learn practices for discernment, filtering, assessing sensory input, and how to allow the flow of ourselves and our perceptive world back into the stream of life.

waking coyote
by

waking coyote

Rose Sinclair

What is it to grieve?

What does it Feel like?

The air of me gasps

The earth of me trembles

The fire of me pushes my blood

The water of me falls in a torrent

They ask it of me, these elements of creation

This full presence

This authenticity of self which includes them

This fullness of humanness not limited to the edges of my skin

When the sunflowers bow their heads to the rain

When the trees crack and break and fall in the wind

When the volcano erupts and the lightning strikes and the grasslands burn

When the rocks tumble and break to become new beings

My fullness of life is not limited to the edges of my skin

The earth holds it all, holds me all

Holds all of me

Gasping, trembling, pushing, falling

And rising again.

Farewell to the Spirits of Place
by

Farewell to the Spirits of Place

Rose Sinclair

Recently we had to move our home from a quiet rural mountainside in Vermont to a neighborhood in Massachusetts — neighbors within spitting distance, street lights, porch lights, etc. When it became evident that leaving was a foregone conclusion, I went deep into grief. The quiet and the wild are much like sleeping and breathing for me — and the adjustment was intimidating. As I wandered in spirit and in my yard, a song from my childhood emerged unbidden and strong — a goodbye song from a children’s show “The Magic Garden” which aired when I was 6 and I was immediately hooked — shapeshifting, trees that held stories, a chuckle patch that shared jokes furled in their leaves… I learned that I wasn’t alone in knowing there was magic in the garden, that everything spoke and had consciousness, and then found that, in fact, I was alone among my peers, and got very quiet about such things, and sought adults to be friends with who could at least hear what I was experiencing.

So, walking in the yard, allowing hot bitter tears to flow, Covid losses, lost job, new job, now have to leave, my familiar died — heart heavy, mind swirling, wishing to scream and instead…

“See ya, see ya! Hope you had a good good time, la dum. Hope you’ll have a good good morning, mmm hmmmm, hope we get to see you again.

See ya, see ya! Glad that you could stay awhile, mm hmmm, glad that we could say good morning to ya, hope you have a shiny day! Byebye now!”

My memory of them singing includes the words “glad we got to spend this time together, hope we get to see you again! Bye!”

And suddenly it wasn’t Carole and Paula singing it in my memory, it was the land wights, letting me know it was ok, they loved having us be so very present to them for 2 years, and knew we wouldn’t forget them…

The land does sing, we just need to allow there’s a song and to Listen for it. Tears merged with a huge grin and the salt taste on my lips was the stuff of life.

It is so.

Thank you Paula Janis, thank you Carole Demas, for sharing your magic with us, magic that continues to grow.